Role Models

A thought popped in my brain a moment ago that I should live my life more like our professional athletes, our role models. To that end I am:

1. Taking performance enhancing drugs and when I get caught denying it all. When the proof is too overwhelming I will blame it on my trainer who must have been spiking my drinks.
2. Punching any photographer, or at least his/her camera, that gets in my way.
3. Kicking any dogs who bark at me when I'm out running.
4. Getting drunk and running over people with my car.
5. Okay, I'll just get drunk and at 4am, with four friends in the car, drive around the city, an accident waiting to happen.
6. Throw my helmet into the stands, not thinking that I might injure a person.
7. Calling my supervisors/coaches/fans etc. idiots in public, on the radio, tv, twitter, in a newspaper article and then wonder why they turn against me and I get traded.
8. Beat or verbally abuse my wife and hit her father.
9. Gamble away more money on one visit to a casino than most people make in a year.
10. Keep my boyz around me, even though they are lowlife drug using slime, cuz, well, their my boyz. Yeah, they may shoot someone outside the bar I'm visiting, but can you prove it?

A verbal apology will take care of all this right? Seems to work for our "role models". "If he would just apologize it would be so much better." NO, no really, it doesn't make up for you being an ass. Really, it doesn't. How about behaving like a decent human being from the beginning?
What would happen if you or I behaved like this in the real world where we work? Fired? In jail? Sure wouldn't get to sign another longterm contract for millions of dollars with another organization.