Texting, Sexting, Embarrassing

There is an ass in the word embarrassing for a reason. When did texting take over our society? Cell phone usage in the United States really didn't take hold until the 2000s. In 1992 less than 10 million Americans owned a cell phone, in 2013 91% of Americans owned a cell phone.
I was behind the curve, only getting my cell about four years ago when we dropped our land line. I still have the same phone, an old LG that texts and makes phone calls, that's it.
Sometimes I miss my old wall phone with the 10 foot cord. What an advancement that was, being able to sit on a living room chair and talk on a phone located in the kitchen!

There were/are advantages to everyone only having land lines;
1. No motor vehicle accidents were ever caused by talking or texting on the phone.
2 People didn't walk into me at the grocery store, work or school because they were playing Candy Crush.
3. I never accidentally sent a text to my daughter that was meant for my wife.
4. Webster's Dictionary didn't take up space including the words cell phone, cellular, texting, sexting or mobile phones.
5. Friends didn't include me in their family text "conversations".
6. No one tried to steal your wall phone when you were walking down the street.
7. My identity couldn't be stolen if someone gained access to my land line phone.
8. What will happen to all the trees if we don't cut them down for telephone poles? Do we really want all those forests untouched?
9. My monthly phone bill was about $200 less.
10. The old rotary phones are much more stylish and could match any decor. Who doesn't love the old green 1970's phone?

And for a bonus:
11. My running shorts or shirts didn't have to be designed to carry a 2x4" electronic device! I was free to just go for a run!

Banning Cell Phones?

Apparently some companies are banning the use of personal cell phones except for emergencies. Here are ten reasons Mike W's place of work might ban cell phones;


1. Mike’s cell phone is a replica of Jerry Seinfeld’s in the early 90’s episodes. His pants fall down whenever he hooks the phone to his belt buckle. This is really bad on those mornings he forgets to put on his underwear.

2. Mike disturbed his co-workers by walking the halls talking loudly to the pizza delivery guy every afternoon.

3. Mike’s cell phone ringtone for Eileen is KC and the Sunshine Band’s song “Get Down Tonight”, which is okay until he begins disco dancing in his cubicle every time she calls.

4. Mike got caught playing fantasy baseball on the cell during meetings.

5. Mike accidently left his phone inside one of his company’s spy satellites. The satellite crash landed in Russia when the phone disrupted some controls inside. The Russian Secret Service keeps calling Mike looking to buy more satellites.

6. Mike tried to text and walk down the hallway and knocked down his boss.

7. Mike’s Tweet followers outnumbered his company’s and they got upset. 4 followers?

8. In a cost-cutting move Mike’s company installed phone booths at the end of hallways and removed everyone’s desk phone and banned cell phones. Employees have to pay a quarter each time they make a call. The company’s stock shot up by .3 cents!

9. Mike keeps walking down the hall saying, “can you hear me now?” Coworkers all yell back, “of course we can, shut up”!! (from Lou)

10. Mike, ever the fashionista, kept comparing his cell phone cover to his co-workers. “Oh, aren’t these colors great?” “Where did you get that graphic?” “I like how that cover matches your shirt”. This was tolerated until his Powerpoint presentation at the last divisional meeting. Now all cell phones are banned.

Cell Phones

Yes, I'm an admitted cell phone hater. Maybe it's because I work in a library and am surrounded by mindless cell phone users who think their scintillating conversations are worthy of everyone else hearing them.

Well, they aren't. Take the damn phone outside the library fool. Can't there be one quiet place for people to study? Let's see, you can't use the phone in class, not allowed in the computer lab connected to the library, but you think it's okay to talk so loudly that everyone within 50 feet can hear you in the library? Idiots.

Anyhow, I'm in the Race with Grace on Thanksgiving Day. Around 3.5 miles into the race I come up on some guy talking to himself, loudly. I begin to pass him and realize, he's not talking to himself, he's on his cell phone telling someone where he is in the race. I'm not sure if the person he was talking to was also in the race. We live in a sad society if you can't be without your cell phone for 45-50 minutes while you are in a race!

I know USATF rules state this is illegal. But even if they didn't, it's just stupid and sad.

At least it was hands-free and I beat him, by minutes. Maybe he had more conversations that slowed him down?